"To Willie Nelson that's a country song"
As I stare down 34, life it seems, is staring back. 34, man, that seems old, older because of it's seemingly insignificance in the scheme of life milestone's. 18: all grown up, 21: booze and such, 25: quarter century celebration, 30: well, shit, ya made it this far, 35: you can run for President, 40: fuck beans that's a long time... this goes on well into passed the time you wish you would kick the bucket. I still don't feel old but the milestone feeling is there for me. So why all the hubbub bub? Well, for me it's the end of a decade long road. 10 years ago, I decided to leave Oklahoma, home, family, friends and the only life I ever imagined for a little dream chasing, all with the promise of nothing. I was lucky that when I chose to jump off this particular cliff that it all worked out, what waited for me when I landed was passion, fun and some damn fine folks. It wasn't without setback or heartache, I had to miss funerals, weddings, births, birthday's of people that I hold dear to my heart. But what it gave in return was the life I never knew I wanted until I started living it.
"The highway goes on"
Life is a tricky bitch. When I decided to come back home I did so with plans as grands as the Oklahoma sunset. It was another leap of faith. I decided to leave what had become a comfortable, happy life in NYC to come back to the place that made me. I was gonna give back to the place I loved most.
"Nothing like your family can make you feel so damned alone"
This leap didn't end as well as the last one. There were not fluffy clouds to slow the fall. No net's to catch me. Just the cold hard reality that the home I left was not the same place. So stage right enter Ira, cruising through this dis-function with brute force, ignorance and loads of pride but pride doesn't pay the bills and it will have you chasing fairy tales. Life being the tricky bitch it is, decided that my plan's were not going to be as cut and dry as I had hoped. But still I pressed on. Then 2012 happened. The bad. In 2013, I quit life. Decided that it wasn't worth the effort anymore, so I sat in my house, a bar, anywhere that would have me. Drank all the drinks, took all the pills, treated all the people like shit and was a big shit kicking baby for 8 month's.
"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls"
The night is never too dark while the light of your friends is brightening your path. It is safe to say that I would not have made it to today if not for you beautiful degenerates. Both old and new, if I call you a friend then you have in some way impacted my life enough to get me to here. Whether it be late night talks about nothing, a workout or two, a drunken philosophy lesson, a reminder that there are still exceptional people out there that I would like to meet or just putting up with my nonsense. My friends rule. That is proven fact, so thanks kids. I appreciate it and I hope I get to spend a few more birthday's not being so sappy.... or maybe I will, don't judge me. Asshole's....anyway, thanks. See ya round the jukebox.
Ira Dean
